“Terror spreads between the cracks”…..that’s the subtitle to Virgin Nightmares the only horror title in Neon-G’s erotic line.  It should have read, “Hilarity spreads between the cracks” because this movie is real funny.  Its not supposed to be but it is.  If your looking for nail biting suspense look elsewhere.  Lets face it.  You’re watching this for Japanese boobies and cheap laughs. 

When a sexy woman is burned for witchery a portal to another dimension is opened.  Her man is also executed in grizzly fashion in an old house.  Years later a man named Yokichi moves his wife and daughter in to the very same house.  They discover that living in some cracks in the wall are some vengeful ghosts.  They occasionally terrorize the family by menacingly sticking their hand out and being very grabby with their black smoky hands.  You get the hint that the ghosts want vengeance for something.  This feels like a total rip off of The Grudge.  You even here the characters talk about grudges on several occasions.  The ghosts also force Yokichi to commit strange sex acts.  There are many opportunities for gratuitous nudity in Virgin Nightmares.  Lots of comical sex scenes.  Including Yokichi cheating on his wife while a single tear drops down his daughters face (some may find this funnier than others).  This is the perfect movie to drink beer and get chip crumbs on your bed as you laugh and point.  The movie also delivers as far a violence and gore are concerned.  Gore fans will laugh their ass off at some of the scenes in this film, including some guy getting his face peeled back.  The budget is clearly non-existent.  Home movies of your eighth birthday at Burger King cost more to produce.

DVD features in the package are also very slim.  The only thing you will find there is a list of other titles on the Neon-G release list.  Technically the film is also hit and miss.  The film stock used reminds you of what you would see for a talk show, not a movie, very cheap.  The director (Masanori Inoue) also opts for the use of dual screen, triple screens, and all annoying quadruple screen.  This shows a serious lack of creative cinematography from the director of photography (Shouji Ehara) although this is not surprising for a film of this caliber.  The one surprise is that the grammar in the subtitles is with out flaw.  The last thing I should comment on is the length of Virgin Nightmare.  It has a running time of a whopping 73 minutes!  I think this should have been included in a double feature or something and not a stand-alone title.

With all the shortcomings of a movie like Virgin Nightmares, it still delivers reasonably enjoyable viewing experience.  This is the first title in the Neon-G line I have seen and am mildly looking forward to the others.  If you come into the movie with low expectations like you should, you won’t be disappointed.  

-kevin-