Halloween Night 2006 The Asylum Home Entertainment   Buy It Now

I think I’m going to have to apply the three strikes and you’re out rule to The Asylum Home Entertainment. This is now the third film that I’ve seen from the company, and it’s obvious that they are far too interested in stealing whatever ideas they can from the horror genre, releasing atrocities that aren’t even fit to be shown on Sci-Fi Channel, and essentially just thumbing their noses at horror fans in general.

Halloween Night is the latest abomination that I’ve had the displeasure of sitting through. On Halloween night in 1982, Chris Vale (Scot Nery) watched as his mother was raped and killed, and during the event, he was hideous scarred when a stray gunshot opened a pipe, blasting him in the face with steam. Chris was institutionalized until ten years later when he escaped and on Halloween no less. Now Chris has returned home only to find a group of teenagers having a Halloween party, but they will be among the many victims that Chris will leave in his wake.

Yeah, this story doesn’t sound vaguely familiar, though Halloween Night claims to be based on true events. Well, after a little research, and taking in the bonus features, the true events actually come down to being the following. David Michael Latt, who happens to be the man in charge over at The Asylum, used to throw Halloween parties. No w apparently one year, there was someone who escaped from an asylum and during the annual Halloween prank, party goers were a little more scared for fear that it was the escapee coming to visit. That’s it, that’s the whole story. There weren’t any murder, nothing of the sort, and The Asylum has mastered on trick and that is trying to hype themselves beyond what is necessary and even fooling people with their ridiculous claims. Let’s no forget the usage on the DVD of one of those phrases that I hate “that started it all.” For the love of god, think of something more original.

Halloween Night wants to be Halloween, it wants to be Friday the 13th, it wants to be just about every slasher film in the genre, but it is in fact none of these. It’s nothing more than a poorly acted, derivative straight-to-DVD nightmare that has no sense of originality, no style, no class, and absolutely nothing of value. The film is poorly acted, featuring some of the worst dialog that a slasher film has ever contained. It is predictable nonsense that does nothing to help an already dying sub-genre in the world of horror that has been plagued with countless sequels and bland movies just like this one.

Also, continuity; where is it? It’s definitely not here. Let’s do some math here. Chris witness the murder in 1982, breaks out of the asylum 10 year later making it 1992, and yet our characters and victims are surfing the Internet and using cellphones. Do I even need to point out the issues here? I didn’t think so. If you’re going to have a time frame and more specifically a year, stick to what should be around, don’t’ just randomly toss out years on the packaging and then not stick with them.

If you feel really brave after watching Halloween Night and aren’t yet ready to beat your head against the wall or claw your eyes out, you can watch this unwatchable, nauseatingly boring film with commentary. You can listen to the real story behind the movie and it will leave you cringing, not in fear, but because the truth itself leaves you wondering why someone would even try and pass this movie off as a real event. There are bloopers and outtakes and simply are not funny or amusing and deleted scenes. Overall, it’s not worth watching, just like the movie itself.

So, the lesson that I’ve learned is that apparently if you hype and package something correctly, you can claims it’s based on a true story. If I write a script about aliens invading the earth and also feature a mother who early on in the film changes the baby’s diapers, I can claim it was based on true events and you know why? When I was just a baby and couldn’t walk, there were a few times that I shit myself and needed the assistance of an adult to change me, so that makes the story now based on true events, maybe even the events that started it all. Halloween Night is a movie worth avoiding at all costs and is just another shinning example of how The Asylum is driving the nails into the coffin of horror and speeding up its death.

-mike-